Seme and Uke
by mattandmello
Summary: Matt and Mello: from Wammy's til death. Cannon. Contains spoilers, swearing, much smut and boyxboy. MattxMello. COMPLETE!
1. Meeting

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. If I did you'd know. Misa would hang herself and the whole story would be about how hot Mello and Matt are together.  Sorry if any one takes offence at the Misa comment. Please don't be angry! R&R would be nice. Thanks.

MEETING:

­Mello had been called to see Roger. This was odd because I'd spent the whole day with him and he hadn't hurt anyone today; he's not in trouble, and the 1st was a week away; L wasn't here on his monthly visit to see Mello and Near. It wasn't like Mello to do something odd without at least warning me first.

I glanced around the food hall and found that Near was missing too. _That's weird_,I thought. Maybe L came early? I doubted it. He was too set on routine. He had visited Mello and Near from 4-5pm on the first of every month for as long as I could remember.

Being away from Mello gave me time to think. I absentmindedly looked around the room again, to my lunch and then to the empty seat next to me.

_Weird_, I thought again. _I actually miss Mello's voice. _The thought of Mello made me blush; I had had an… interesting dream about him again last night. I seemed to dream about him a lot. I was beginning to worry that I talked in my sleep, because the morning after a very… graphic dream about Mello he refused to look at me and blushed when I spoke to him. I forced the memory of the dream from my mind. It would do me no good to think of Mello naked while in the crowded food hall. Especially seeing as Mello wasn't here to defend me.

_No. _I decided. _I miss Mello._ I blushed again, suddenly glad Mello wasn't here. I wasn't used to being able to think freely without Mello trying to decipher every reaction and emotion reflected onto my face, while sexily managing to eat his weight in chocolate daily. It was rare to see him without a chocolate bar in his hand.

I stood up, threw my untouched food away and began to walk back to our room. It worried me to be away from him for so long; we were basically inseparable and it had been an hour since he left me in our shared room, sitting on my bed playing on my DS.

Mello was my best and only friend at Wammy's. _My best friend, _I thought bitterly. Although _everyone_ in the _whole_ orphanage, teachers included, knew that I liked, no, I fucking _loved_ Mello, he seemed determined to not notice.

I wondered if it was better that way. Mello's friendship meant more than life itself to me and if he found out how I felt about him, if he was disgusted or repulsed by my feelings… by me… I didn't know what I would do. He was my only reason for suffering though each day.

As I walked up to the door, I was able to hear odd noises from within. Someone was in our room crying. I opened the door slowly and found Mello sobbing quietly, while angrily throwing clothes towards an open suitcase. I stared at his back, surprised.

"Are we going somewhere, Mel?" I asked, naturally assuming that he wouldn't leave this hell-hole without me.

"Mello?" I asked anxiously. He turned to face me and I saw tears running down his cheeks. I could feel a pain in my chest at seeing him like this but I also felt proud because I knew that I was the only person he would ever let see him cry.

I looked into his big, beautiful blue eyes and couldn't help but notice how perfect he looked even with tears running down his smooth, pale cheeks. I wanted to run forward and hold him in my arms and comfort him but I found that I couldn't control my legs.

"_I _am leaving!" he yelled.

It felt like someone had stabbed me in the heart. He was planning on leaving me. Was he really blind enough to not notice that I would follow him to every corner of this God forsaken earth? I had barely survived an hour without him. I shuddered at the thought of waking up to find his bed empty.

"And… you're… leaving me… behind?" My voice cracked on the last word. Could he not see I needed him?

He looked up at me, surprise written across his face.

"I was going to…" he said, blushing. "I'm not coming back. Ever." He looked at me and his beautiful eyes tried to decipher my reaction.

"Why?" I asked cautiously and began to study the floor to hide my eyes from his.

"I'd prefer not to talk about it," he stated flatly, with finality clear in his voice.

I knew better than to question him. He seemed to be controlling his emotions very well considering he would have usually lashed out by now. I didn't want to push him and make him angry.

I found my eyes being drawn to his face and took a step towards him.

"I'd like to come with you… if that's okay." I was silently praying that he'd let me go, which surprised me; I wasn't usually so religious. I took another careful step towards him so that there was only a small space between us.

"Mello, can I go with you?" I asked, watching his face very carefully. He looked as though he was going cry again.

"Aw, Mel, please. Don't cry." I took the last step and closed the space. I cautiously put my arms around him, worried he'd shrug them off or hit me, but miraculously he hugged me back and his tears began to fall, landing on my striped top.

"Are you okay?" I asked softly.

"Yes…Thank you," he said, surprising me. Mello was never polite to anyone. "Please… come with me."

I didn't pause to think about my answer. Really, the fact he felt that he had to ask offended me.

"Of course. I'd have followed you anyway." I blushed. I hadn't meant to add that last statement.

Mello looked up at me and I blushed even redder. Holding Mello in my arms was beginning to remind me of my dream.

"I'll have to start packing," I said practically running to our shared bathroom, trying to cover my arousal.


	2. Escape

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note but I own a Death Note. I love it. Please R&R. Thanks. :)

ESCAPE:

It was around 10:00 when we left. We had completely emptied our room and we had about $200 together. It would be enough for now. We had stayed long enough to eat dinner in the food hall and we smuggled as much food out as we could. Mello's chocolate took a whole bag.

Mello had called for a cab and when we got outside the cab was waiting. Mello packed all of our bags into the boot as I took one last look at the orphanage.

I had been there for as long as I could remember. Unlike most of the orphans, I couldn't remember my real parents. I had spent nearly all of my time there with Mello and I had slowly begun to love him. At the start many of the kids had picked on me and Mello had been there to defend me and slowly the kids backed off, too scared of him to bother me anymore. He had been there when I needed him. He was funny, caring, smart, badass, and so damn attractive. Mello had, on numerous occasions, walked out of the bathroom after a shower with nothing but his towel and rosary on, luckily without noticing the effect it had on me.

As I climbed into the cab, I felt Mello's eyes on me. I looked to him, my eyes full of wonder, trying not to picture him in just his towel. His hand was limply holding a chocolate bar and looked as though he wanted to say something, so I remained silent, waiting for him to speak. I _loved _his voice.

I was felt exhausted and couldn't restrain a yawn. He noticed and for a second I saw guilt in his eyes. My eyes opened exceptionally wide as I felt him grab my arms and pull me against him so my head was on his chest.

"I'm sorry," he said. "You should be in bed by now."_ Mello was concerned for me!_ I cheered inwardly. _He cares!_

"Don't worry," I said smiling warmly at his worry for me. _I enjoy every minute with you and would hate to sleep through any time I had with you, _I added, mentally_._

He gently rested his head on mine.

"What were your parents like?" I asked. I'd wanted to know for a while.

"I only remember what Roger told me about them. My dad was an acholic and he abused my mum.-" I noticed how maliciously he said this and was honestly frightened- "I was taken by child services after he hurt mum enough to get sent to jail and for her to die in hospital. I was then taken to my Aunt's to live but shortly after I moved in, she was in a car accident. She was my last living relative. I was a smart baby I was sent to the orphanage. I was 2."

I was surprised at how much Mello told me. It seems that he trusts me. I hugged him close to me.

"Do you want to speak about your family…?" he asked awkwardly.

"I don't know anything about them. Roger offered to tell me but I didn't want to know. All I know is I was taken to Wammy's when I was four." _And meeting you there was the best thing that's ever happened to me._

I yawned again.

"Please, Matt. You're tired. Go to sleep."

Sleep. That sounded good but I couldn't waste _any _time that I had with Mello.

I fought of sleep for a little while longer and we talked until I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer.

I snuggled closer into his chest as exhaustion took over. He patted my hair and hugged me as I fell asleep.


	3. Dream

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. I wish.  R&R would be nice. Thanks.

DREAM:

I was at a dinner party in an expensive mansion and I was surrounded by people in beautiful dresses and suits, suited to Elizabethan Times, all swirling to the music. I was dancing too. I knew that I was looking for someone else, so I excused myself and left a confused Near to find another partner. I suddenly noticed I was in a black suit.

I wandered around unsure of who I was looking for and caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror on the wall of the majestic dance hall. I didn't have my goggles with me. I swirled around until I was dizzy and I began to fall. I was caught by a beautiful and elegant man who was standing alone, master of the house.

He had stunning, shiny blond hair and was in a black suit that looked perfect on him. Everything about him was perfect. He looked as though he were searching for someone too. I looked into Mello's eyes and instantly realised that he was who I was looking for and he was looking for me. My breathing became uneven. He smiled his beautiful smile and walked off, leaving me to catch my breath. I followed him to the master bedroom, and into the ensuite.

The huge bath was full of warm water and bubbles and there was champagne and chocolate covered strawberries on the side. Mello popped the champagne and poured two glasses. I took the glass I was offered and took a sip. It tasted magnificent. I put it down as he leaned forward and our lips met. He kissed me softly and gently. We both began to undress and climb into the bath. I was surprised at how easy my clothes came off considering how much my hands were shaking. I offered him a quivering hand and led him into the water.

"I love you Mello. I always have. I need you. Never leave me."

"I promise."

We began to kiss and I slid my hands over his chest. His tongue licked my bottom lip and I parted my lips to allow him entry into my mouth. I moaned into his mouth as his tongue explored. His hands tangled into my hair and-

I suddenly woke up. The cab had gone over a large bump.

It took me a while to comprehend where I was. I was on Mello's lap with his arms around me. _Oh. My. God. I'm on his lap! I'm in his arms!_

I realised that my dream had left me _very _aroused. _Crap! _I thought.

Luckily, he appeared to be asleep. His breathing was slow and even and he had a slight pink tint to his cheeks. I hugged him closer to me and he sighed contently. _God, please let him be asleep, please._ He certainly seemed asleep.

Without thinking, I lightly pressed my lips to his forehead. He looked so peaceful, so innocent.

While at Wammy's I had often found myself watching him sleep from my bed across the room from him. It made me sad to know that I would spend my whole life watching him from afar. I had always known that Mello and I would be together for the entire of our existences. We needed each other, Mello and I, and even if he never realised this, well… I'd never leave him anyway.

"Sleep well, my beautiful Mello." I whispered into his ear and kissed him on the forehead again.

I snuggled back into his chest and fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.


	4. Sleep Talking

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. I wish I owned Mello and Matt though… R&R would be nice. Thanks.

SLEEP TALKING:

The next morning I woke up to a depressed and embarrassed Mello. He had somehow carried me into the hotel and then carried up our luggage. I was lying on the couch with my head on his lap. I smiled sleepily and yawned.

"Umm…" he said. His cheeks were a beautiful shade of pink. "Morning."

"What's up?" I asked wondering why he was being so awkward.

"Nothing!" He responded a bit too quickly.

I looked at him quizzically. "If you're sure…"

Mello had slowly begun to tell me about what happened in Roger's office. L is dead, Near and Mello were both meant to take his place, the idea of working together with Near was too much for Mello, he flew into one of his rages, Mello gave in, Near won.

It took a few weeks to get this information out of Mello and I was patient. Mello was in pain and I didn't want to force the story out of him.

While Mello was slowly dying inside, I was ecstatic. We were free from the prison that was Wammy's orphanage and _I was with Mello_. My heart rejoiced while his broke. He let me hold him whenever he broke down. Every night he fell asleep in my arms with tears in his eyes.

I was slowly realising that he could never love me as much as he loved L. It hurt me to discover this and whenever L was mentioned, I was instantly angry the Mello could love a corpse moulding in a coffin more than me even though stupid L had only caused Mello pain. It was that shit head L's fault that my beautiful Mello was always compared to that brat Near and that Mello often went for nights without sleep as he strived to better himself in order for him to be respected by L. All Mello had ever wanted was L's respect. And now we were working to help that dip-shit L, trying to avenge his death and kill Kira.

As I thought this over bitterly one night, a month after we left Wammy's, I felt Mello's eyes on me. I quickly erased all emotion from my face to hide my thoughts from his eyes because I was convinced that he would be able to know what I was thinking.

"Matt…?" He sounded uncertain and anxious. We were sitting in the kitchen and scraps and packaging from take-out littered the table. He held an unopened chocolate bar in his hand. I noticed that he had been holding it for a while now. _Odd, _I thought. _He would usually be up to his fifth chocolate bar._

"Yes?" I prompted him cautiously.

"Why did you come with me?"

_Because I love you and I would follow you to hell and back. _"Because you needed me." I was worried that he had begun to regret bringing me. I wasn't exactly the best company, I knew that, but I tried. I looked after him when he needed it and left him alone when he wanted me to.

"Yes, but why?" He sounded confused now. It still hadn't clicked in his mind that we were perfect for each other and that I loved him so much it caused me physical pain.

"Wammy's held no interest for me without you." I had decided to put it lightly. _Life _held no interest for me without him.

He smiled at me warmly and I felt my heart stop then start again going faster than normal. _I'm acting like a lovesick schoolgirl, _I scolded myself. But I couldn't help but be jumpy; Mello and I were alone together 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and he had started wearing tight, black leather pants that revealed his hips and perfect flat stomach. I spent a lot of time playing on my DS or PSP, trying not to look at him. Of course, my dreams about him continued. What did he expect dressing like that?

"Matt, if asked you something serious, would you answer me truthfully?" He was staring at me again and I could see that he was once again studying my reaction.

_Of course. I'd tell you _anything_ you wanted to hear. _"Depends."

"Umm… Well…" he said, struggling to find the right words. He decided the question he was about to ask was too hard so he settled on an easier one. "Did you know that you… um… talk in your sleep?"

This question caught me off guard. Surely this wasn't what was bothering him. "Really? Oh…" Realization sank in; I spoke about him in my sleep. _Shit!_ "What about?" I tried to sound casual but my heart was racing. My face burned red.

"Umm… mostly about Wammy's… but … you, umm, said my… Forget about it."

"Mel? What's bothering you?" _Bad move, _I thought. _I shouldn't have asked._

"Well, a few times, you, umm, said… my name…"

"Oh." _Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! How am I gunna get out of this one? Fuck!_ "Mello… I can explain. I just…" I looked everywhere but at his face, into those eyes that saw into my soul.

"Do you… like me?" he asked quietly.

_NO, I FUCKING LOVE YOU! _"Of course. You're my best friend," I replied, proud that my voice was even.

"Well, yeah, but do you _like _me?" He was blushing too.

_You actually have to ask?!_ "Mello, I… Yes…" I said. _God dammit! For once in your life, be brave! Tell him!_

"For how long?" he whispered back.

_Forever. _"Since I met you," I said, fighting to keep my voice even. The floor suddenly became very interesting.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, his voice sounded sad. "Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I trust you!" I yelled quickly. I paused. "… I didn't want to ruin our friendship."

I felt an arm placed around my shoulders and a hand lifting my chin. Mello gently leaned in and placed a light kiss on my lips. I kissed back and opened my mouth. I groaned as his tongue explored my mouth. Then I suddenly remembered something. I pushed Mello back gently.

"What did you hear? What did I say in my sleep? When did you first hear me?"

"I first heard you…I think it was during exams this year. I was up late studying and you said my name. You said it clearly and I thought you were awake but you roll over and said my name again. Most nights you would just say my name… but sometimes you would say you… _loved_ me. I ignored it though because you said a lot of weird stuff in your sleep." He smiled, trying to cheer me up. I was so fucking embarrassed.

"Why did you start believing… what I said?" He took my hand in his and entwined our fingers. He was being so… unlike himself.

"Well, that dickhead Near told me. I didn't believe him at first but… I began to see it. The way you acted… you never left my side… I was angry that Near worked it out before me. I decided I'd wait for you to tell me. Then last night… the way you practically _moaned_ my name… well, I could tell your dream was pretty 'heated'."

I blushed bright red again and closed my eyes as tightly as I could. "… You heard?"

"You woke up and I thought I would be better for you if you thought I hadn't heard, so I pretended I was asleep. And you were so… kind to me after… after what happened."

"Did you really not notice the effect you had on me, the effect you _have_ on me? You always stuck up for me and you were so nice and funny and smart and… so fucking hot…"

At this he laughed. "I'm 'hot', Matt?"

Notes: OMG. It hurt me so much to write all those horrible things about L.  I love L.


	5. Sixteen

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. If I did, the whole story would be about how Matt and Mello. 

Notes: This chapter continues directly from 'Sleep Talking'.

SIXTEEN:

"God, Mel! The sight of you in just your towel and your rosary…" I shivered as I remembered. "And then _skin-tight leather pants_? I mean for fuck's sake, Mello, how could I _not_ be attracted to you. How any straight man could _not_ think about screwing you-"

My eyes opened wide as Mello lips caught mine. He opened his mouth and our tongues danced, both of us were fighting for dominance. I gave into him and his tongue began to explore my mouth again. Mello was an amazing kisser. _He _was amazing. _Probably all those chocolate bars, _I thought. _Oral fixation. _I moaned into his mouth and he pulled back to catch his breath.

Mello smirked as I began to kiss his neck. He put a hand under my chin and pulled my face up so I could see his eyes.

He seemed to have forgotten about L for the moment. For now he was my beautiful, happy, joking, bad ass Mello.

"Seriously, Matt, did you really think I'd believe you were straight?" He laughed. Then he smirked again. "You used to wake up with a hard-on after moaning all night and screaming my name into a pillow." _Shit._

At his words, all of the colour drained from my face and I was as white as Near. "Was it _that_ bad?"

Mello said nothing and his face became serious. "Mattie?"

"Yeah, Mel?" I said, still pale.

"Was I 'good' in your dreams?" I couldn't help but laugh at him.

"Fuck, _yeah_!"

"Well, I must have been considering how loudly you screamed out my name." Mello leaned in to quickly kiss me again. "Mattie?"

"What?"

He grabbed my shirt and pulled me in to bedroom. "I want to see if I'm as 'good' as you dreamed." He began to kiss and bite my neck making me moan when he bite a sensitive area.

"Mel. Mmm... I don't think-mmm- we should be doing-mmm- this." I said, even though I wanted to so badly.

He stopped immediately. He was angry. "You love me but you don't want to have sex with me?"

"Shit, Mel, you know that I want to, but we're only 15-"

"And, what? You're scared you'll get pregnant and your dad will throw you onto the streets when he finds out?!" he yelled sarcastically at me.

"Mel? Mel, please. Calm down, Mel." I put my arms around him and let him settle down. "What makes you assume you'll be on top?" I smiled mischievously. He smiled sexily.

"I could prove it to you…" he said, suggestively.

"Please, Mel, just wait until we're both 16. Please?"

"I'm not promising anything. You're the one who's so horny that they have sex in their sleep. And I must say, hearing people practically orgasming and screaming out your name is a huge turn-on and who knows how desperate I may get…" He began to nibble on my ear as I imagined him down on his hands and knees, begging me to fuck him. I smirked and pushed the thought away; I had won for now and I didn't want to ruin my argument by getting a hard-on.

"So. What do you want to do?" I asked.

"Well, seeing as we are in the bedroom-"

I cut him off. "Mello! I already told no!"

"If you let me finish. I was going to say that seeing as we are in the bedroom we could get into bed"-I raised an eyebrow-"and watch TV."

"Oh. Umm, okay."

I took barely any notice of the TV. As I lay with my head on Mello's chest, I let my mind drift. The only reason I had told Mello to wait was so that he had to stay with me in order to get what he wanted. Mello _always_ got what he wanted and, now that I had provided him with a challenge, he had to stay in order to win.

I yawned. I was suddenly exhausted and Mello's arms were comfortable and warm.

"Night Mel," I said before falling asleep, wrapped in his arms, smiling.


	6. Excitement

Disclaimer: Death Note isn't mine. Please R&R. Thanks 

EXCITEMENT:

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Mello had sent me out to the shops again to get more chocolate. _Only God knows how he can eat his weight in chocolate every day and still stay as thin and perfect as he is, _I thought as I walked back to our new apartment.

When I got back Mello was in the shower. I could see that his clothes for today were set up on the bed. _Damn him, _I thought. _He's still trying to get me to sleep with him._

I didn't know how fucking hard it was going to be to say no to Mello. Every time he has a shower, he 'forgets' his clothes or his towel so that he has to walk past me with almost nothing on. And the way he eats his chocolate._ It fucking turns me on!_

I heard the water turn off, so I quickly grabbed my DS and started playing to distract myself. Mello came out in just his towel and rosary. _Big surprise._

"Hi Mattie," he said. I could practically hear the smirk in his voice. God, his voice is so sexy. He coughed quietly and I couldn't help looking up at the breath taking sight before me.

"Fuck, Mello. Get some goddamn clothes on."

"But Mattie I don't want to. Do you know what day it is?" _Shit, what did I forget? It's not his birthday. Not Christmas. Shit!_

"No," I said, trying to sound uninterested.

"Shit. Matt… it's your birthday." Fuck. I looked at the calendar disbelievingly. It is too. Wow. "Did you seriously forget?" he asked, laughing.

"No," I answered quickly.

"Lucky _I _didn't forget," he said, smirking again. "I got you something. Under the bed."

I reached under the bed and pulled out a surprisingly heavy, square box. I raised an eyebrow and began to tear off the wrapping.

_Oh. My. God. _Fuck. A PS3. They aren't even out in the U.S. yet!

"Fuck Mel! Thanks! This must have cost you heaps. I owe you. Thank you." I smiled at him as warmly as I could and leaned forward to kiss him. Just before my lips met his, he put an arm on my shoulder.

"You know, there's a way you could pay me back," he said suggestively. God, I wanted to give in to him so much.

"Mello!" I said exasperated. "Don't you want a special birthday?"

"We could make yours 'special' too."

"Mel." I could hear the whininess in my voice but couldn't get rid of it. "Please stop. I told you I don't want to yet. Three weeks! It's just three more weeks! _Please_. Mel, we have the rest of our lives to fuck each other as much as you want. Just give me three more weeks. I promise that you'll have the best birthday ever. Please, Mel? Please?"

"Fine!" He stomped into the bathroom and slammed the door.

I followed him and leaned my head against the door. "Mel? I'm sorry. Please come back. I have your clothes. Please let me in," I practically begged. "I could help you get dressed if you let me in," I added hopefully.

The door was opened so fast I fell into Mello's arms. I stood up quickly and pushed him against the wall, lifting both of his hands above his head and holding him there. He grinned and opened his mouth slightly. I forced my tongue into his mouth and let our tongues dance. He gave into me and I quickly took control, letting my tongue feel around inside his mouth. I moaned; he tasted delicious. I pulled back to breath and started to bite his neck softly.

"Mmmmatt." I smiled as he half-moaned my name over and over as I bit a sensitive area on his neck repeatedly. I was so hard and I didn't care anymore. I wanted him. I needed him. Screw being sixteen.

"We should stop. You said you'd help me get dressed." What the fuck? He had been trying to seduce me for ages and now that I give in he doesn't want it?

"What the fuck, Mel?"

"You said you wanted to wait. Just because you're overcome with hormones now doesn't mean you won't regret not waiting later." This surprised me.

"And you're not overcome with hormones?"

"I always am for you Mattie," he growled sexily. "But it's your birthday and I don't want you to do something you don't want to."

"I want you. Now."

"No, you don't. You're thinking with your dick. I'm gunna go and get dressed," he stated with finality. "That won't help. Leather pants."

I laughed. Fuck, I'm so hard for him I can barely think straight.

"Well, I'll just have to borrow some of your clothes."

"What?!" He looked amused. Mello reached into my cupboard and grabbed out some of my loose jeans and a white hoodie. He looked hot, even in my clothes and that didn't help my current situation at all.

"I've never seen you in white before." For as long as I knew Mello he had always wore black. Always. I walked up behind him and put my arms around his waist. "Fuck. You're so hot."

He laughed and turned his head to kiss me on the cheek. "Go have a shower," he said. "A nice, long, _cold _shower."


	7. Presents

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. Please R&R. Thanks 

PRESENTS:

Mello was smiling when I woke up. Seeing him happy made me happy too.

"What are you so happy about?" I asked after hearing him singing.

"My birthday's in exactly three days." He smirked.

_Oh shit! _I had lost track of the time. I don't even have his presents yet.

"I have to go out for the day," I told him. He smiled.

"Me too. I've been thinking," Mello said, suddenly serious. "We can't do this alone. We need help." I stared at him confused so he continued. "Catching Kira."

"Oh. Who were you thinking of?"

"Umm… maybe the mafia…" he said trying to sound casual.

"No Mel! It's too dangerous! Don't!"

"I'll be fine."

"You mean _we'll _be fine. Mel, I'm in this with you til the end. I can't live without you."

He hugged me and kissed me forehead. "I promise that you won't ever have to."

"I love you Mel," I whispered. He gasped and I pulled back. I looked in to his beautiful blue eyes concerned. "What? What's wrong?"

"That's the first time you've ever said that." Oh.

"But you know I love you," I said confused.

"It's still nice to hear you say it though." He pulled me close to him again. "I love you too," he whispered into my ear. He was right; it was nice to hear.

After an hour of kissing Mello -something which I found fucking addictive- and unsuccessfully trying to convince him to stay away from the mafia, I was in the shopping centre, wandering around, looking for something to give to Mello.

I walked into the supermarket and filled my basket with cooking chocolate and walked into the hygiene aisle. I went through my shopping list as I thought. as I walked. _Don't need tampons. Already got toothpaste at home. We have shampoo. Mello needs conditioner. _I grabbed a bottle of Mello's favourite conditioner. It smelled like chocolate. I smiled, thinking of Mello's beautiful hair that was so soft and shiny. I continued walking but paused at the nappies. Realization hit me. _Fuck… I'm never going to be a father. Wow. _I had never thought about this. Mello had always just seemed enough to me. I suddenly felt empty, like something inside me was missing. I had never really wanted kids -after my childhood, I was put off the idea of bringing children into this shitty world- but I missed having the option. I wondered what Mello thought about this.

People began to give me weird looks so I starting walking again. _Don't need soap. _Mello only uses the chocolate scented soap. I used to think it was weird but he smells delicious so I never said anything.

_In three days, _I thought, _I'm not going to be virgin. Shit. God, I hope it doesn't hurt. Mello will probably fuck me til I can't stand anymore but if he lets me top I don't want to hurt him._

Finally I reached the area I was looking for. I looked around to make sure no one was watching me. There were two options in front of me but I had no say; I'd already made up my mind. I reached out and grabbed a tube of chocolate scented lube. I bet that most people in this shopping centre would have gone for the other option- the condoms.

I went to the check out with the female teen trainee. I felt awkward about purchasing the lube but the trainee didn't seem to care.

Next I went to a cake shop. Placed an order for the biggest chocolate cake they made. I looked around the shop and bought some chocolate alphabet moulds and the mould for a L in 'Old English Font No. 5'.

I went home to find to Mello wasn't back yet so I took all the groceries inside and unpacked all the shopping bags. I had ended up with three shopping bags worth of chocolate. Mello will be happy. I put on an apron and began to make part of Mello's birthday present.


	8. Chocolate Scented

Disclaimer: As much as I wish I owned Death Note, I don't, nor do I own the characters. Please R&R. 

Notes: This was… 'fun' to write. Here comes some lemon.

CHOCOLATE SCENTED:

I woke up early without disturbing Mello and went straight to the fridge. Lucky for me, Mello only eats chocolate, which he keeps in the freezer, and whatever take out we have for dinner so he never opens the fridge. I grabbed out his cake and some of his presents on put them on the tray he used to serve cake to me on my birthday. I lit candles and put them on his cake.

I walked back into the bedroom carrying the tray and looked at Mello. He was beautiful when he slept; his hair all messed up, the blanket tangled around his feet, his thin legs covered in lose tracksuit pants, his sexy, flat chest snow-white against the chocolate brown sheets and his face looked so peaceful.

I jumped onto the bed next to him and he woke up.

"What the fuck, Matt?!" He yawned. "I was having such a nice dream…"

"Oh no, you don't," I said while shaking his shoulder. "Wake up! Don't you know what day it is?"

He sat up suddenly almost knocking the tray off my lap.

I leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Happy birthday Mel," I whispered in to his ear.

I pushed the tray onto his lap. He smiled and blew out the candle on his cake.

"I love you too, Mattie," he whispered, looking down onto the tray on which I had made the message 'I love you Mel' using the chocolate moulds. I saw tears begin to form on his eyes; I had used the 'L' that had L used on the broadcasts he had shown on the TV to Kira.

"Aw Mel, don't cry."

"I'm not crying," he said stubbornly, angrily wiping away the tears.

I reached forward and picked up the chocolate 'L' in 'love' and offered it to Mello. He smiled and ate it out of my hands, licking my fingers clean of chocolate when he was done.

"Don't think I forgot your other promise," he said grinning sexily. I put the tray on the bedside table next to him as I leaned forward and offered him my lips. He quickly began to kiss me as I lay down next to him and pulled him on top of me. He lifted my striped shirt up over my head and threw it away. I moaned into his mouth and began to grind my hips against his, loving the friction it caused. I threw my arm out, my hand searching for the handle on the bedside table. I found it and pulled out the drawer. I grabbed the tube of lube as Mello bit my neck and pulled off my pants. I tilted my head back, giving him better access to my neck.

"Mmmel…" I moaned. I rolled over so that I was sitting on his lap. Mello stopped biting my neck and leaned up to reach my ear. He sucked on my ear lobe.

"Happy… mmm… birthday Mel…"

"Love you Mattie…mmm," he whispered into my ear.

I started to grind harder. I had little control over my body and I could feel his erection poking into my thigh. I began to pull off his tracksuit pants and he lifted his legs off the bed to help. I threw them to the floor and put my arms around his waist. He rolled me onto my back. He was now completely naked and his warm chest rubbed against mine as we both grinded our hips together, moaning. He sat up and pulled off my briefs before grabbing the lube out of my hand. He opened the lube and smiled at me.

"Chocolate scented," he said, laughing and I smiled at him. He covered his fingers in the lube and positioned a finger at my entrance. Mello looked at me and I nodded. He gently pushed his finger into me and I winced at the pain. He quickly leaned forward and kissed me, trying to distract me. He began to move his finger as he nibbled on my lower lip. When I got used to it, he added another finger. I winced again as he started scissoring me.

"Relax Mattie," he said, smiling. I nodded and he added a third finger. When I was prepared he gently removed him fingers and covered his erection in lube before pressing against my entrance.

"Ready Matt?" Mello asked and suddenly he looked worried. "I'm sorry it hurts."

I smiled weakly and he slid into me. I bit my lip hard trying not to let him see how much pain I was in. He stayed still and let me relax bit more. I could tell that he couldn't wait much longer.

"Go."

He gently slid out a bit then thrust back in. I moaned and winced.

"I'm sorry," He whispered.

"Don't stop," I growled at him, trying to sound encouraging. It's his birthday and this is what he wants. I'd suffer through anything to make him happy.

He thrust back in, this time hitting my prostate. A wave of pleasure rushed through me and I moaned, digging my nails into his back.

"Ahh… Mmmel… Faster…"

Mello pulled almost all of the way out and drove back in, harder than before. He angled himself so that he hit my prostate with each thrust.

Mello placed a hand around my cock and began to pump it in time with each thrust. He leaned down and I kissed his neck.

"…Matt…I'm g-going…to…ungh…cum…"

I reached my climax. "Love you… Mel…" I spilt my seed over both of our chests. This caused Mello to reach his too and he exploded into me, screaming my name before collapsing onto my chest, panting.

"Mel?"

"Yeah, Mattie?"

"You're better than my dreams," I said smiling.

He laughed.

"I love you Mel… and next time I dibs top," I said before falling asleep with my lover in my arms.


	9. Uke

Disclaimer: I don't own Matt or Mello or the Death Note. Please R&R. Thanks 

UKE:

The next morning I carefully lifted Mello off my chest and began to walk towards the bathroom. I desperately needed a shower; my chest was covered in cum and my whole body was covered in sweat. As I opened the bathroom door I heard Mello murmur my name.

I turned on the hot water and stepped into the shower, watching the glass fog up. Shit, I forgot to turn the fan on. The water burned my skin as I reached forward to find the tap. Finally my hand found the cold tap and I began to play around with the taps, trying to cool the water. I jumped as I felt arms wrap around my waist.

"Morning Mattie," Mello whispered into my ear. I moaned as he nibbled on my earlobe.

"Hey Mel." I turned my head and kissed his jaw. He sighed contentedly. I smiled.

I reached over for the chocolate scented shampoo and stood behind him so I could wash his hair. The shampoo reminded me of the shopping I did the other day.

"Hey, Mel?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you… umm…" I didn't know how to ask him. "Did you ever think you wanted to umm… be a dad?"

"Oh. Umm… not really. Wammy's kinda put me off… But if you want kids… we could adopt or something…"

"Nah. Wammy's put me off too. But if we're together we can never have kids the, uh, 'normal' way. Are you sure?"

"Fuck yeah. Kids piss me off."

I felt relieved. I put my arms around his waist and rested my head on his right shoulder.

"Mel, I love you. Last night was amazing." I began to suck on his ear.

He moaned and said, "You wanna go again? You were so beautiful, Uke, with your hair all sexed up, and-"

I spun him around quickly so he was facing me. "What did you call me?!"

"Uke…" he said, amused at my reaction.

"You think your Seme? I'm not Uke and I told you, I dibs top this time."

"You'll have to fight me for it." He smirked and captured my lips with his. Both of our tongues began to struggle for dominance. One of his hands tangle itself in my hair and the other slid down the front of my chest to grab my half-erect cock.

"Shit Mel," I mumbled into his mouth, giving him just enough time to pin my tongue to the bottom of my mouth.

He pulled back. "I win," he said, grinning. "On your hands and knees. Now," he ordered.

"What? No. Mel. What the fuck?" I was confused. He put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me down.

"Hands and knees." I did as he said and he forced his finger into me, using the shower water as lube.

"Shit!" I cried. "What the fuck, Mel?! You fucking-" He forced another finger into me. "Shit!" Tears welled in the corners of my eyes. I was in so much pain. "Mel -argh! - I don't want to- oww! Fuck!" He quickly stretched me.

"On your back."

I did as he said quickly. Shit, he was fucking hurting me, that bastard. Even worse, he was raping me. _Technically, it's not rape, _I thought. _I know I want this too._

Mello pushed his erection into me and I yelled. I couldn't hold back the tears any longer.

He leaned over to kiss away my tears; he face was apologetic and concerned. "God, I'm so sorry,Matt. I'm sorry. I couldn't control myself. I'm so sorry. Matt?"

"Move you bastard," I said, smiling feebly.

"No. I'm sorry. I'll pull out. I'm hurting you."

I sighed and thrust up hard towards him, so that our hips were touching.

"Ungh… God, Matt… Mmm…"

I winced but he didn't notice because he had shut his eyes. He continued to slam his hips against mine and the pain turned into pleasure. He started thrusting harder and faster, hitting my prostate almost every time.

"Aww… Mel… ungh," I whimpered and scratched my nails down his back. Mello smiled down at me and looked so beautiful, so sexy, so… perfect that it pushed me over the edge and I came. He yelled my name and released his seed into me.

He collapsed next to me with the bottle of shampoo in his hands as he began to massage the shampoo into my scalp.

"I'm sorry I hurt you."

"I love you Mel." I said. I had already gotten over what happened; the mind-blowing sex had washed away all my anger.

"Love you too, my sexy Uke."

"Next time can I be Seme?" I asked hopefully.

"Not a chance." He smirked. "Unless you think you can overpower me?"

"I promise you that I will get to be Seme and that I'll fuck you so hard you can't walk for a week. I'll keep trying."

"You have a lifetime to _try_ and I have a lifetime of triumph ahead of me." He smiled and began to rinse the shampoo out of my hair.

"Bastard," I said, laughing at his self-assurance.

I carefully stood up and pulled him up after me. I grabbed the soap and washed him with the sponge. He shivered as I washed his back.

"Mmm…" he moaned as I began to wash his half-erect cock.

"Are you serious? You just fucked me and your _still _horny?!"

"Fuck off!" he said blushing. "Oh. We have to go out today. I met up with the mafia while you were shopping and they agreed to help us."

"Oh. Umm. Okay. You're good," I said impressed. "How'd you do it?"

"Secret," he said smiling and he walked out of the shower with a towel. I turned off the water and followed him, wrapped in a towel. I sat down our bed and he dried my hair with a spare towel. I smiled gratefully. When my hair was dry he got dressed as I watched.

"Perve," I heard him murmur as he plugged his hairdryer into the wall.

I walked over to his closet and pulled out a pair of his leather pants.

"Shit, Mel. How thin are you?" He looked confused so I continued. "How the fuck do you fit into these pants?"

Mello turned around and almost fell over laughing. He walked over to me and helped me pull the skin-tight leather over my legs. Mello took a step back to look at me and I blushed as he gasped.

"Matt, holy shit. You should stop wearing your usual ugly pants and start wearing mine. If we weren't in a hurry, I'd fuck you right now."


	10. Burnt

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. Please R&R.

Notes: Sorry if I have any dates wrong and that it's so rushed. I don't have my Death Notes comics or access to the internet while I write this. Yay, I bleached my hair blonde today 

BURNT:

I had spent the day in bed with a cold, playing on my PSP while waiting for Mello to get home. I had had a cold for 3 weeks and had tried every type of cold medicine available. I couldn't go to the hospital or doctor though because Mello and I were working with the mafia and we were being searched for in 3 countries.

We had spent almost 3 years working with the mafia and today was the first whole day I'd without Mello in that entire time.

I was bored of _____________ so I turned my PSP off and grabbed the TV remote. I turned on the TV and began flicking through the channels. _Fuck, _I thought. _It's 6:00 that means news or reality TV. _As I flicked through I saw footage of an explosion so I went back to that channel. Shit. Some building in the middle of nowhere has exploded with causes unknown.

I froze with my eyes open wide and I could feel my blood freeze and my heart stop. _Mello…_ I quickly got into my car and drove to the building. Fucking Mello is a fucking idiot. He was going to get the Death Note from the Japanese Taskforce today. What situation had he been able to get into that resulted in an explosion? Shit, if I followed the road laws I would be there in an hour. That isn't soon enough. I sped up, going as fast as I could while keeping control over the car.

My mind quickly through all the possibilities; Mello dead, Mello at a different building, Mello dying… most of which ended badly and resulted in me hanging myself.

I sped along the highway, making it in 40 minutes. As I climbed quickly out of my car, I saw the remains of a building that was still smoking and a fire engine. I ran up to one of the fire fighters and described Mello. He told me that no blonde was found and that the ambulances had just left.

I sat on the hood of my car and cried as I watched the firemen climb back into the fire engine and drive off. I got up quickly and ran through the ruins desperately trying to find Mello. _Please, God, no. Please let him be alive. Please._ I chanted over and over again in my head while I screamed out his name.

Tears blurred my vision and I had almost given up when I saw something black sticking out from behind a bush. I ran as fast as I could and found Mello on the ground. I quickly picked him up and carried back to my car. As I gently placed him lying down on the back seat, I noticed that he was unconscious and the side of his face and neck was all bloody. I placed my head on his chest and heard his heart beating.

"Shit. Aww Mel. Please keep breathing. Stay with me."

I swiftly opened the glove box and grabbed out the first aid kit and found a drink bottle on the floor. I washed his face and neck, added antiseptic -glad that he wasn't awake to complain about how much it hurt- and did my best to cover his burn in gauze. I took off my vest, folded it to serve as a pillow for him and carefully tilted his head. I parted his lips so that I could drip water into his mouth and keep him hydrated.

I drove home as quickly and smoothly as I could, trying not to brake too much so that Mello stayed still, thanking every God I'd heard of that he was alive and praying that he'd live. I stopped every 10 minutes to pour more water into Mello's mouth.

I carried him inside and gently lowered him onto the bed. I seized a tray and put a bottle of water, some chocolate, a washcloth and the first aid kit on it. I went back to the bedroom and cautiously pulled the gauze of Mello's burns. I washed all the blood off his wounds, added antiseptic and covered the burns in gauze, slowly and carefully.

I got another cloth and wrapped around some ice. I laid down next to Mello and lightly pressed the cloth against his burn.

Poor Mel.

As I thought about how lucky I was that he lived, I placed my head on his chest so that I could listen to his heart.


	11. Insecure

Disclaimer: I don't own Matt or Mello. Please R&R.

INSECURE:

I was unlocking the door, my arms full of shopping bags, when I heard a smash. I almost ran inside and dropped the bags onto the counter before running towards the bedroom. Mello had been unconscious for two days after the explosion.

"Mel?"

"Piss off, you fucking bastard," I heard him yell back. I tried to push open the door but something was blocking it. Mello was probably standing on the other side.

"Mel, let me in. What's wrong?"

"For fuck's suck, Mail, I told you to piss off." _What the fuck is his problem? _I thought. _He only uses my real name when he's really pissed off. Shit. He probably saw the burn._

"Mihael, you better fucking let me in right fucking now or I swear I will leave and not come back." I was bluffing; I could never leave him.

"Fine. Go then. I told you. You're not coming in here." Tears started to form in my eyes.

"Fine," I said. I could feel my heart breaking. "Have a nice life." I began to walk towards the door.

"Wait. Matt?" I stopped. "Matt, please don't leave me. I need you." I could only just make the words out. "Please just leave me alone for awhile. Please?"

"Whatever," I said and unpacked the groceries.

"Mello, I'm going out," I said. I desperately needed a cigarette.

"But you're coming back right?" He sounded worried and vulnerable but he still didn't open the door. Because of this I wanted to tell him I wasn't, I wanted him to run out and stop me from leaving him… but I couldn't. I loved him too much.

"Of course, Mel. How many times do I have to tell you that I will never leave you?" I said affectionately.

I felt so much better when I got back home with my packet of cigarettes and a block of chocolate. I slid the chocolate under the bedroom door and got a blanket from the cupboard. I fell asleep on the couch.

I managed to make it through a week without a cigarette but sleeping on the couch every night gave me little sleep and I was constantly pissed off. Even still I left a bag of chocolate at the bedroom door whenever I had a shower so that Mello could take it when I wasn't watching and replace the bag with fresh clothes.

I couldn't take it anymore. If he didn't come out I have no choice be to force the door open.

I lit a cigarette and began to play on my Xbox. Suddenly, the bedroom door swung open.

"Matt? Are you okay? I smell smoke." He ran into the lounge and stared at me. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Hello to you too, bastard. What the fuck were you thinking-" I turned around and look at Mello. My mouth fell open. His was open too and the unscarred side of his face was blushing.

"Matt?"

"Oh my fucking God. That's not fair!" I yelled.

"What?" He looked confused and slightly afraid.

"No matters what happens to you, you _always _look better than me. It's not fair." I knew I sounded childish but I didn't care.

"Wait, what?"

"For fuck's sake, Mello. You've been hiding from me for a week because of that?"

He blushed a darker shade of pink.

"You idiot. Why?" Now I was confused.

"Because I was scared you'd leave," he mumbled.

I walked to him and took his face in my hands. "Mel. That scar is the most sexy and badass thing I have ever seen in my life besides you. And I've already told you a million times: I will never leave you."

"You wanna know the most sexy and bad ass thing I've ever seen?"

"What?"

"You with a cigarette hanging out the side of your mouth." He smiled and leaned to kiss me. "I've missed you, Uke."


	12. Gunpoint

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. Please R&R. Thanks.

Notes: Sorry Near-lovers. This chapter is really short and rushed. My word count says it's only 235 words. I like Near too but Mello is meant to hate him. And Matt, well, he pretty much just does whatever Mel tells him to.

GUNPOINT:

Mello came home from the SPK after seeing Near in a surprisingly good mood. He explained to me what happened; he had Hal Linder at gunpoint, she took him to Near, Near told him the new L is Kira, he told Near ___________, it's a race to find Kira first.

"Wow. L is Kira, which means there's a smaller chance of us being able to get him. Imagine the security he has," I said, lighting a cigarette.

Mello's phone rang and he answered quickly.

"Near," he told me, looking surprised. "What do you want, Near? ...What? How did you … Fuck off, you son of a bitch." Mello threw his phone at the wall.

"Shit Mel. What happened?"

"That bastard just asked me how you are."

"And…?" I was puzzled. "Wait, how'd he know?"

"I don't know. But then he asked me if I was enjoying the sex." Mello was obviously pissed off.

"That son of a bitch. What the fuck is his problem? How the fuck does he know?"

"I'm going to kill him." Mello sounded certain. He looked as though he might throw something else.

"You finally beat him at something," I murmured.

"What?"

"As if he's had sex or even kissed anyone. That loser will probably die a virgin." I put my cigarette out.

Mello smiled at that. "Speaking of sex, Mattie…"

I practically jumped onto his lap and started kissing him.


	13. Fight

Disclaimer: I don't own the Death Note. Please R&R. 

FIGHT:

"God dammit Matt. I told you to watch the fucking screens!" Mello yelled. He was so sexy when he was angry. "Just coz I'm fucking you, it doesn't mean you can screw up all the time!" So damn sexy.

"Yeah," I agreed, though I had no clue what he was talking about. "You're right." I just wanna jump him right now. He's glaring at me. Dammit, what was he saying?

"Matt! Are you listening to me?"

"Umm…" I was confused. Did he want me to agree or not? "No? Sorry-What?"

Now he was absolutely furious. Shit. I'm screwed. I braced myself for pain and it came quickly. Mello punched me hard in the mouth.

"Oww. Fuck, Mel." I said and walked into the kitchen to spit the blood from my mouth.

"No, fuck you, Matt. What's wrong with you? What is your fucking problem?"

"I was… distracted?" I begin to study the floor. As well as being hot, Mello is also very scary when he is angry.

"For fuck's sake. Look at me." He gently lifted my chin and lightly brushed his lips against mine. "What's wrong Mattie?"

"N-nothing…" Don't get distracted again. Don't look at his beautiful face, his gorgeous body, his skin-tight pants, his deep blue eyes…

"Matt? What the fuck are you thinking about? Fuck, you look like your orgasming." He laughed as I blushed. "But seriously why do you keep spacing out?"

"You're so…" _Amazing, sexy, gorgeous, stunning, beautiful, heavenly, hot, godlike… perfect._

"Fine. Don't answer. Go back to watching the fucking screens." He got a chocolate bar and left the room, leaving me hard and lonely, muttering to himself.

It had been like this since we started following Amane. Mello hardly spoke to me and pretty much just ignored my attempts at conversation. It was only when he was horny that he noticed me and as soon as he pulled out of me he would leave the room.

"God, Matt!" I jumped; I hadn't noticed him walk back in. "What is your problem? You're hardly listening to me!"

"What? Me? Hard? Maybe…" Mello raised his eyebrows and glanced down at my erection. He smirked and grabbed my cock roughly. I hissed at the pain and scrunched my eyes closed.

"Excited Mattie? So is that what you're daydreaming about?" Mello began rubbed me gently and I moaned. I was so close- "Too bad that you have to watch the screens; otherwise I could have done something about that." He pouted his lips and released my erection.

"Mello, you bastard, help me." I glared at him. It was his fault I was hard anyway.

"I'd rather not." He smirked again and left the room. "Watch the fucking screens."

That bastard. What the fuck is his problem? How dare that asshole leave me to finish myself!

"Mello, I'm going out," I yelled to him and quickly left before he could say anything.

That night I met Melanie.


	14. Melanie

Disclaimer: I don't own Matt or Mello.

MELANIE:

"Mel, I'm going out."

He grunted a reply.

I walked into my favourite strip club and sat down in front of the pole on which my best friend would be dancing. The lights dimmed and the spotlight pointing at the pole came on. A woman came out and began to dance around the pole.

Melanie. My new best friend and the person I went to for advice.

Since the first time I came to this club, she was always the only dancer I watched. Every show she was dressed in only a black, leather bikini top, a miniskirt and thigh-high leather boots. Her shoulder-length, straight, golden hair shined under the spotlight. She reminded me of _him_ and that was why I had started this routine.

When she saw me, she waved and I smiled. I knew my plans for tonight. Mel's show, sex, coffee, supermarket and then go home to Mello. I sighed. Every Friday was the same.

After her show, Melanie grabbed my hand and pulled me to her dressing room, just like always. And, just like always, we had meaningless sex just because I needed it.

This was why I liked Mel. She didn't care that I had no life, she didn't care that I was cheating on Mello, she didn't care that I was using her to vent my frustration at him. She knew that whenever I screamed 'Mel' during sex I wasn't referring to her. She was there for me when I broke down while we had coffee at the same place as always. She held me while I cried into her shoulder and comforted me while I told her about Mello. If I didn't love Mello, I would have married her.

As always, I went to the supermarket feeling much better and ready to put up with Mello for another week. I bought the same brand of chocolate for Mello as I did last week, and the week before that and the week before that, and the same brand of cigarettes and the same groceries. I lit a cigarette as I walked to the car and drove home.

I walked inside and began to put the groceries away. Suddenly, I noticed that someone was crying.

"Mel?" I walked into the bedroom. I was surprised at what I saw.

Mello was on the floor, crying, with his face covered in his hands. A redheaded woman was kneeling next to him, wearing only a white and black striped bikini, trying to calm him down. She looked up as I walked in. I ran to Mello and threw my arms around him.

"Shh. Mel, what's wrong?" No reply, just sobs.

"Can I, um, speak to you for a minute?" I asked the woman.

"Sure," she said following me to kitchen.

"What happened?" I was worried about Mello and didn't want to leave him for too long.

"He brought me here and we started kissing. When I pulled off my skirt, he pushed me away and started crying. I've been trying to comfort him for half an hour."

"Thanks for trying. How much does he owe you?" I reached into my back pocket and pulled out my wallet.

"Oh. Well, we didn't actually do anything-"

"Will a hundred cover it?" I was tried of talking to her and wanted to speak to Mello.

"Oh, thanks." She took the money and left.

I walked back into the bedroom and stood next to Mello.

"Mel?" I asked softly, sliding down the wall to sit beside him.

"I'm so sorry. I couldn't take it anymore. How can you put up with me every fucking day? Why do you even bother?"

"What? Mel, don't say that. I love you."

"I followed you. You slept and had coffee with that blonde chick. You always do. Because of me…"

"Mel… I'm sorry." I put my arms around him. "I-"

"Don't worry about it. I woulda done the same thing." He looked up at me, his eyes were red and puffy, and his were cheeks tear-covered. "Matt…"

I gently kissed his cheek. "Why the redhead?" I asked him.

"She wore a white and black bikini, it was like your top… she looked like you," he said blushing.

"Oh." I blushed too.

"Why Blondie?"

"She works at the club. I see her every week and it's always the same. She comes out in black leather." He smiled slightly at this. "Her hair is almost as beautiful as yours is. She reminds me of you, like you were at Wammy's. I see her every week because…" I began to whisper, embarrassed at what I was saying even though it was true. "It was like I had the old you with me. I missed you. Now, you're always angry or hunting Kira or throwing stuff at me… you don't have time for me anymore. I don't fit into your life as I used to."

"Matt," Mello said sternly, taking my face in his hands and forcing me to look away from the floor. "Don't ever say that. I love you. I _need_ you. We were made for each other so we _have _to work things out." He voiced turned soft. "I can't live without you. You mean so much to me and I'd die if you left."

Tears welled in the corners of my eyes. "That was the most beautiful I have ever heard."

"I know. Tell anyone and I'll kill you," he said smiling.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. His lips moved gently against mine. I unlocked my arms and slid my fingers down his chest to the zip on the front of his top.

Suddenly he grabbed my hands, forcing me to stop, and pulled back. I looked at him confused. "Wha-"

"I owe you. I hurt you and I'm sorry. I'm giving in to you; you have total control… Seme. Be careful with me," he said as he smiled softly and let go of my hands.

Okay this is really sappy. Please R&R. 


	15. Seme

Disclaimer: Death Note isn't mine. Please R&R. 

Notes: this carries on directly from 'Melanie'

SEME:

"Mel…" I was speechless. It was the first time I had seen Mello willingly show sighs of vulnerability.

"I'll do whatever you want, Seme," he said. I just stared at him, astonished. "Well? What do you want?"

"I, um… I want you to… Help?" I had no clue what I wanted.

"Well, sex is usually easier if we're both naked."

"Okay. Then I, uh, want you to… kiss me," I said. As he leaned in to kiss me, I resumed taking off his top and threw it to the floor beside him. I started on his pants but struggled to get them off.

"Here," Mello said standing up and he quickly pulled his pants off.

"Come here." He sat down on my thighs and began to kiss my neck. I moaned as I tried to decide what I wanted. _Firstly, _I thought, _I want top. Secondly, I want… _I slid my hand down the middle of his back and he shuddered. _I want to hear him scream for me. Thirdly, I want … I want him to beg me._

"What do you want from me?" He asked.

I was confused. "What?"

"What do you want me to do to you, Seme?"

"Well, I want to have sex with you." I was still confused, my head tilted slightly to the left.

"More detailed than that," he said softly, still nibbling on my neck.

"I… umm…" _How does he expect me to think when he's doing that to me? _I thought. "Touch me."

Mello curled his fingers around my cock and began to pump slowly, making me moan. My legs spread wider as Mello's hand went faster. His thumb circled around my tip as the rest of his hand went up and down. At that point, I couldn't hold back any longer. I roughly kissed him without holding back. I shut off my mind and let my body take over.

"On your back." Mello did as I said.

I hurriedly pulled off his briefs and undressed myself. I got the lube from the cupboard next to Mello and covered my fingers. I looked at him and he nodded.

I quickly forced a finger past his entrance. He winced and thrashed but I put a hand on his shoulder to keep him still.

"Relax, Mel. The pain will stop. I promise."

I carefully hooked my finger and began to stretch him. I kissed his neck trying to distract him from the pain that I knew well.

"Shh. The more you move the more it hurts and the faster I do this means less pain for you. Relax, Mel."

I gently added another finger. "Mel, it's okay. I know it hurts, but if I don't do this, you won't enjoy anything. You're almost done now."

_I didn't complain this much._

I added a third finger and stretched him as much as possible.

"Ready?"

Mello nodded weakly. I lubed myself and slid into him. I gave him a moment to get used to the feeling and he nodded. "Move," he whispered.

"No," I said. "I'm the Seme. I want you to beg me."

"No. Move you bastard!" He was pissed off. He tried to thrust into me but I held his wrists in one hand and pushed down on his hips with the other.

"Mello. Beg me."

"Mattie, pleasssseeee. Pleasssseeee. Seme, make me scream for you, thrust hard. Please Mattie, move."

I smirked and thrust into him. He moaned loudly and I pulled back, almost the whole way, and slammed back into him. I let go of his hands and he wrapped his legs around my back. He bit my neck with each thrust. Finally, I hit his prostate.

"Matt!" he yelled in between gasps. "Fuck me harder, Matt! Harder, damn you."

I slammed into him aiming for his prostate, my hips banging against his and he thrust back. He looked so perfect, his hair was plastered to his face, as he moaned and screamed my name.

I put my hand around his cock, pumping it slowly.

I was about to cum but I didn't want him to, yet. I held his cock tightly not allowing him to release. "Hey, what are you-" he began to argue.

"Mel!" I yelled and threw my head back, as I came into him.

"Matt, I need to-"

"Not yet." I smiled mischievously and he glared at me.

"Oh. My. God. I'm fucking leaking."

"Now you know how it feels."

He about to talk back but his argument was cut short as I took the head of his cock into my mouth. I sucked gently and cupped his ball sack. I gently massaged it and he whimpered loudly.

"Ungh… Matt… That feels… amazing…" Mello said, panting.

I licked all the way up his length before pumping him with my hand. I began to suck on his ball sack.

"Matt… I need to-"

I took his cock back into my mouth and he released his hot, sticky cum. "Matt!"

I swallowed quickly. He tasted incredible. He tasted I collapsed onto his chest and he gently lifted my face so that he could see into my eyes.

"That was amazing. Fuck. Matt, you were incredible." He wiped the corner of my mouth and I licked the cum off his finger.

"You taste amazing." He smirked.

His voice was suddenly serious. "I dibs Seme next."


	16. It Ends Tonight

Okay, so I'm ending this story with this chapter. I really hate this story so feel free to steal any parts you think are worth anything. Sorry if this disappoints anyone. :(

IT ENDS TONIGHT

This was it. My last night with you. My last night in our shitty apartment. My last dinner. My last time to scream for you and dig my nails into your back as you pound into me. My last chance to hear you yell my name. My last time to watch you sleep in my arms after our last round of sex. My last shower with you. My last breakfast of chocolate pancakes. My last time to hear you laugh. My last hug. My last kiss. My last chance to tell you that I love you and to hear that you love me too. My last goodbye. My last look at you as you speed off on your motorbike. My last look at my only love, my best friend, my family.

We both knew it was coming, like a darkness slowly engulfing us, a problem that we didn't dare voice aloud, but we tried to ignore it and spent our last night like any other. And yet it was so different, special somehow.

We smiled constantly and every sentence ended with 'I love you'. Every second we were connected somehow, holding holds, kissing, hugging. Even the sex was different- not that I'm complaining.

Candles were lit and it wasn't about simply receiving. It was about- as sappy as it sounds- being together. We were gentle and careful rather than rough and fast like usual. You whispered that you loved me with every thrust. When we were done you pretended to sleep it my arms, trying to pretend that nothing had changed but I knew you were awake so I held you tightly, whispering to you and running my fingers through your hair.

Time sped up the next day. One minute the sun was just rising the next we were showered, dressed and you were making your favorite chocolate pancakes.

You smelled like chocolate and cinnamon. Each movement was deliberate. Your golden hair captured the light perfectly. You were full of grace and the most pure beauty. Your voice was overly cheerful but I could hear the underlining worry. Your skin was like velvet, your hair like silk, your lips so soft. I noticed everything about you. You tasted like chocolate and something so amazing, indescribable, so utterly Mello. It was like my impending death had heightened my senses, trying to use a life time's worth of each of the five senses in my few remaining hours.

I kissed you goodbye for the last time and whispered that I love you against your lips. I repeat those words as I watch you drive away, the last time I will ever see you.

As I get into my car I pray that by giving my life I save yours, but I know it is in vain.

Kira, you bastard, an angel dies tonight in your place.

I shoot the smoke bomb and try not to look at you. I doubt that I would be able to go through with the plan if I saw you. It's childish by for a while I try to convince myself that we'll be fine, that this is a dream. Maybe if I don't believe it you won't die.

Bullets pierce my skin and I become numb as I fall to the ground.

I regret not telling you that I love you earlier. I regret Melanie. I regret hurting and angering you. I regret playing video games instead of hugging you. I regret every moment spent without you. But I don't regret my death. You asked me to help and I die knowing that you were happy to play you part in the defeat of Kira and that I helped you achieve that.

You deserve better than a death by Kira. I can imagine him, Light Yagami, the fucking bastard, discovering your name, whispering it as he writes it. Mihael Keehl. He doesn't deserve to know your name. For him to say it is an insult.

I feel dizzy and weak. I'm surrounded by blood and it takes me a moment to notice it's mine. I close my eyes.

I love you, Mihael, always have and always will.

That was shitty. Sorry people. My Gods, so sappy. Ugh. That's the last chapter. Seriously, if anything is worth salvaging from the terrible story then feel free to take it. I apologize once again for the crappy ending. I needed to kill this story and get it over with. I apologize for any disappointment. Written to '_It Ends Tonight_' and '_11:11 P.M._' by All American Rejects.

Mattandmello. xxxx


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